How do you make a land merry? Go to Baltimore. Here are just a few exports out of this harbor town:

1. Natty Boh, or National Bohemian beer. It tastes like Lady Ga Ga’s underwear, but its parent brewing company invented Colt 45 in 1963. Now that we can be thankful for!

2. John Waters, a visual genius. He made adult diaper sales spike with Pink Flamingos and then later released Hairspray…how does one transition from a film that makes people quite literally vomit on the spot- and then effortlessly transition to a movie that has you wrapped up in the high hopes of big-boned dancing diva?

3. Old Bay Seasoning: helping your taste buds hit the jackpot for over 70 years. You can sprinkle this jazz on seafood, fried food, popcorn, etc. etc. and it is a sure fire home run. You may think that you have no clue what it is, but you’ve probably had at least a tablespoon in the past week.

4. Frank Zappa. Beyond his dynamite career (“My Guitar Wants to Kill Your Mama“, “Eat That Question“, “The Voice of Cheese“, “Don’t Eat the Yellow Snow“) he named his kids: Moon Unit, Dweezil, Ahmet Emuukha Rodan and Diva Thin Muffin Pigeen. Damn.

5. Beach House. A Baltimore-based duo that consists of Alex Scally (guitar, keyboard & vocals) and Victoria Legrand (vocals & organ).

Wanna argue with us about #5? After putting Beach House’s upcoming album Teen Dream on repeat for the past month, contest is highly unlikely. They survived the sophomore slump and with their third studio album, it’s clear that they’re not slowing down. In fact, Teen Dream ups the tempo while preserving Legrand’s swooning vocals. Don’t worry- Beach House still boasts dreamy, ethereal magic that wraps you in a cocoon of layered sound. Legrand and Scally have just expanded their repertoire.

Teen Dream (Sub Pop) drops tomorrow. We endorse it. In the interest of allowing you to make an educated decision about how great this album is, we have sacrificed blood, sweat, and beer to provide a free download of their new single “Norway“; use responsibly!